Ethan's house is really hot in the summer, but the light filters into the kitchen as though everything in the world is beautiful. The dust that comes from the kitchen table when I move uncontrollable piles of letters, paintings, plates, etc just lingers in the air, caught in between light and gravity. It's as though everything stops and has no real meaning when inside his walls. You know what's so much cuter? They don't see it.
Eth's dad doesn't understand that his silence and cassette player make their family so strange. The fact that he's into I.T and yet fights his kids to get what he wants? They legit intrigue me.
When Eth messages me on facebook I honestly am interested in what he has to say. It happens so much, that those few times I'm disappointed, are forgotten.
I'm saying this stuff ^^ to remind myself why I love him so much. I'm at this point again; 5 months of a relationship, going to Mt Isa in the holidays... It's my ex-boyfriend all over again. This is that crucial moment where I have to man up and realise, he still loves me even though he doesn't say every second. He still thinks about me even if its not that longing death he used to experience. Even though he's not keen to flirt anymore, even though he says something mean every now and again and doesn't care about watch what he says.. He doesn't hang on my every word like he used to, but he still loves me.
I expect everyone to love me every second. That's why I cheat. It's the shittest quality ever. I'm going to sacrifice a lot for Ethan though. If I don't, I'll never know if we're something real or not. I'm making such an effort... I hope he sees it.
It's a joke how much I love him.
Sorry for wasting your time with shit words. My bad.
Charles - x
No comments:
Post a Comment